Madam! madam!! We are at your junction! abi this is not where you called? Madam! Madam!! wake up!!!
Oh! Sorry, Thank you! Folashade who had slept almost immediately after she entered the bus woke up. Thank God for the light tap on her shoulder by a sweet passenger and the shout of the conductor.
Folashade woke up and checked into her purse to pay the driver while struggling to tend to her toddler who seemed to need something, but Folashade wouldn’t budge. Let’s get home, abeg, after which she murmured some things to herself. Obviously, she was exhausted, but, who would believe her story?
Motherhood they said, is a beautiful journey and a beautiful story to listen to. Well, could be true but not when…
Folashade couldn’t get a hold of herself on time because her toddler wouldn’t permit her to, yet the conductor wouldn’t stop shouting at her. So pathetic! Wo! Just get down fast because time na money and the time no dey. The conductor kept saying this and more. Eventually, Folashade was able to get a hold of herself, her load, and her toddler and headed home, but her eyes were reddened with tears.
Back at home, she sat on the couch to breastfeed her toddler who wouldn’t stop crying. Her baby was so hungry that mid-breastfeeding, he bit on the nipple. Aw! Folashade screamed and almost started crying, but then, she had to position the baby well to prevent another bite. At this time, she could relax a little while she fed her baby, but then, tears started forming in her eyes, yet again.
She remembered how, about thirteen (13) months ago, when she birthed her baby. The excitement was immeasurable. Friends and families gathered around her and were at her beck and call anytime she needed their help. Abi? At last, their wonder baby was here and he was cute like the mum. Oh, nope. He combined the beauty of both the dad and the mum.
The excitement in the air was nothing compared to the ‘joy of motherhood’ she was about to experience. She had been told how beautiful it was, how she would be able to tell people off her kids, how, how, but her trouble started a few days after birth, right at the hospital. She couldn’t produce enough milk for the baby and the baby wouldn’t stop asking for more. She wondered what could’ve happened, but she couldn’t think because her baby wouldn’t stop crying. She informed her Mother-in-law who, immediately swung into action. She prepared a watery pap to aid lactation. She brought herbs and some other lots of things, but, none worked. At this point, Fola wouldn’t stop panicking.
The doctors tried their best but warned her to get enough rest as that would help hugely, but how could she rest? Her baby needed to eat!
Any time her baby cried, she puts him on her breast to suckle, but the quantity of milk wasn’t sufficient for the baby, so, he tried to suckle hard and at times, bite the nipple which led to bruises. Fola hated herself so much because she felt she was not being a mother enough. She cried every time the baby cried because she couldn’t produce enough milk. The mother-in-law helped a lot, but, it seemed the help wasn’t enough. Milk still wouldn’t be let down.
About three weeks after, with so many herbal concoctions, she was able to lactate and feed her baby properly. Again, she could be a good mother to her baby. Again, everyone was happy that she could smile again, even though her nipples were bruised.
A week after the success against low lactation rate, everyone left, except her. She needed to care for the baby anyways. During the stay of the mother-in-law, she had learnt how to bathe, dress and tend to the baby, so she felt she could do it well. She did well, but it was soon telling on her. Her husband had gone off to work and wouldn’t be back until about three months after. Mama was nowhere near, she needed to tend to her business too. She couldn’t get a nanny or help because the last time she suggested it to her husband, he tagged her lazy and said mama would be angry. So, she had to bear the stress of cooking, washing, and cleaning alone and adding the responsibility of tending to the baby to it, she was fading, fading in stress. Again, she had her business to tend to, but she placed it on hold for a moment so that she wouldn’t freak out.
She managed quite well for some time until…
One day, she backed her baby as usual. Then, a stranger screamed at her for not backing him properly. The stranger said so many vulgar words that Fola wanted to reply, but she chose not to. The stranger could be an expert at it, we thought. So, she asked how the proper way was, but the stranger had no answer and left instead.
Some other day, she met someone who called her attention to how tiny the baby was. She said Fola didn’t deserve to be a mother because she couldn’t observe so simple a thing to know that her baby was sick, but what the stranger didn’t know was that Fola was on her way back from the hospital. But again, Fola chose not to say anything, but smiled and went home instead.
While reminiscing on all these, she remembered a day she almost burnt their house down. She was tired from all-day work and a little rest, but she was hungry. She needed to eat so that her baby would have enough to suckle, so, she started cooking. She prepared everything, placed it on the cooking stove and returned to her room to do some other things. About 45minutes after, she heard some heavy bangs on her door. She checked the time to be sure they were not thieves, but the knocks got heavier and voices started calling out to her.
She opened her bedroom door to the sitting room and was welcomed by smoke that had covered up every part of the room. That was when she realized what she had done and why the Knocks were that heavy. She locked the bedroom door to prevent the smoke from entering the bedroom because her baby was there, opened the door so that her saviours would enter the room and rushed out while coughing heavily. She ran back inside like a mad woman when she remembered her baby was still in, wrapped him up, carried him on her chest and rushed out while still coughing. Her saviours were able to put out the fire that was still gathering, opened all the windows so that the smoke would be out and pacified her. Actually, only a few of them pacified her. Others shouted and said hurtful words instead.
At this point, Fola couldn’t bear it anymore. She cried aloud and screamed at all those talking harshly at her. She told them how tiring it was to be a nursing mother, but most people choose not to say it. She let them know that nursing mothers hurt too. She screamed at them and let them know that nursing mothers get tired mentally, physically and emotionally and they are humans! So, don’t blame them too much if you can’t help. And if you can help, just do that with a good heart and let them be! She thanked them for coming to her rescue and left to a far place, but it was somewhere close to her house, to cry.
Aw! There was another bite on her nipple by her toddler that was still breastfeeding. The toddler looked at his mum and smiled. At this point, her toddler was done eating. She looked at him, carried him in her embrace and smiled at how fast her baby was growing. Well, despite all, she was doing well.
Written by: Monsurat Surajudeen.
